so here i am, 6 and half years clean and i am battling my weight...again. having once ballooned up to 314, then gotten down to 233, now, after injury and baumgartner type dive off the healthy food wagon i am at 299. i have to find my way again, out of the obsession of eating. it is "using" in a different sort of way- the drugs are gone but the need to fill a craving remains.

I was given the gift of physical sobriety. I did not have to work for it. I though I was dying; literally. I had been drinking for over thirty years and thought I had liver damage. It turned out to be something else. Not life threatening. But it still scared me straight.

I new this page -  i am new to changing my ways -denial for years alcholics are good at fooling others and themselfs i wantchange i feel traped in this , congrats to the group who have done such long lenghtnes and small lenghts well done xx

I am starting this journey of recovery and really need and want feedback.  I am seeing a councelor for the last 5 months.  Iʻve slipped up 2 times since.  

My entire family knows, including my 3 children.  Itʻs painful and scary.  My councelor keeps telling me that I am moving forward but that i need to surrender to my addiction instead of trying to beat it....iʻm not sure how to surrender and what that really means?  I admit i have a problem and i want to get better.  

What does it mean to surrender to my addiction?