I was given the gift of abstinence. I say a "gift" because it came about because I was scared. I thought I was dying; literally. I thought I had serious liver damage. I mean, I drank for 30 years. So I stopped. But it turned out to be diverticulitis. Still serious, but not life threatening. 

I find myself looking inward over the past few days, and to be honest I have no idea who I am seeing in the mirror.  I see an adict, a lyer, thief, and many other horrible things.  Finally reaching the point of being sick and tired, and wanting to see my old self again I called my doctor today and for the first time, I admitted to having a problem and to see what options I have.  After a bit I found out they will send me to a outpatient clinic where I will be given medication to help with the problem, also I will attend meetings, drug test, and even a shrink to help with other issues which

I don't understand this website very well. It says to get the worksheets you have to go to the public forum? What happens if you want to work the steps but you don't know where to get them?

I am starting this journey of recovery and really need and want feedback.  I am seeing a councelor for the last 5 months.  Iʻve slipped up 2 times since.  

My entire family knows, including my 3 children.  Itʻs painful and scary.  My councelor keeps telling me that I am moving forward but that i need to surrender to my addiction instead of trying to beat it....iʻm not sure how to surrender and what that really means?  I admit i have a problem and i want to get better.  

What does it mean to surrender to my addiction?

Hi,

My name is Jody and I have 15months sober.